


Same Old Lang Syne

by Constance722



Category: The Young and the Restless
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:47:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28275555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Constance722/pseuds/Constance722
Summary: Philly Christmas ficFutureMulti-part
Relationships: Billy Abbott/Phyllis Summers





	1. Old Acquaintance

Old Acquaintance

“Looks like you got here just in time, Miss Summers.” He leaned further across the glass case to be heard over the blaring loudspeaker. “You better be careful heading home on these roads.” 

Phyllis smiled at him as he quickly bagged the deli items for her and passed stepped out from behind the counter to place them in her cart. “Thank you, Greg,” she said softly. “I’ll be fine. My formative years were spent in Wisconsin, so this is nothing for me.” 

“Ah,” he grinned. “I do remember you saying something about that now that you mention it. We don’t get a whole lot in the way of winter weather around these parts, so when it comes the whole damn place just shuts down.” 

“That’s not so bad I guess. Gives everyone a little extra time at home over the holidays, right?” 

He tilted his head as if to consider the legitimacy of her argument. “You’ve got a point there,” he finally agreed. “You need some help getting these out to the car?”   
“I’ll be fine.” She waved to him as she headed towards the door. “You take care and have a Merry Christmas.” 

She couldn’t help but think about how she’d be spending the holiday this year. It wasn’t going to be the holiday she’d planned, nothing like last year for sure, but she was determined not to wallow. It could be so much worse. She’d had so much worse. There was a multitude to be thankful for and this year, she would focus on that. She would be grateful for that. She would spend her time relishing in all the good in her life and stop fixating on every mistake she’d ever …

Her steps suddenly stopped, the cart hitting something unmovable which she quickly realized was a person. “I’m so sorry,” she immediately responded. “I wasn’t paying attention and …” 

She saw a hand raise and realized a phone was pressed to her victim’s ear. If his harsh tone was any indication, his night had been ruined far before this encounter with her. 

“So you’re telling me that two inches of snow on the ground literally stops everything? No flights, no rental cars, nothing. That’s the most ridiculous …” 

He was still talking, but the words no longer computed. It was the tone, the intonation, the gestures, the inflection of every single syllable. For a moment, she considered she might be going crazy. This was Charlotte, North Carolina. There was absolutely, positively no reason for Billy Abbott to be here – just as there was no reason for her to be. And yet she would be every cent she had that the man in front of her, the man she’d nearly plowed down with a shopping car was the same man she’d been fighting to keep out of her mind for nearly three years. She swallowed hard before forcing her lips to form the word. “B-B-Billy ..” 

The reaction was unmistakable. The voice became silent. The phone lowered. The shoulders dropped and then he slowly turned around to look at her. 

She’d heard people say that time stood still though she’d never truly understood the concept until that moment. His face, his eyes … the way he looked at her – in that one instantaneous second, it was as if nothing had changed, as if no time had passed, as if they had never been apart. 

“Phyllis,” he repeated, both of them realizing at the same time that the only words they’d managed to speak had been each other’s names. 

Nervous laughter filled the silence and he stepped a little closer towards her so that the automatic doors would close and block the biting wind. “What are you … I mean, you’re here … How are you?” 

Her head shook slowly as her mind whirled around the same questions. “Yeah. I am … I uh, I live here. I mean, I’ve lived here for about 2 and half years now. It’s a long story kind of …” In truth, it was a fairly short story – one she could have summed up in a quick few sentences, but one she suddenly didn’t want to share with him. “What about you? You don’t live ….” She let the question hang in the air. 

“No. I’m still in Genoa City. There’s this event in Miami … it came up at the last minute and Jack wanted somebody there. Because of the holidays, the jet was already booked, so I thought I’d fly commercial and I was supposed to catch a connection here, but …” 

She smiled knowingly. “Snowmageddon.” 

“Right,” he sighed. “I mean, there’s what two inches on the ground.” 

“And possibly 2 more inches tonight and tomorrow.” She widened her eyes in mock seriousness. “They take snow very seriously around here. You’ll find that out quick.”

“Yeah, I’m starting to get that message.” He held her gaze longer than was necessary and finally forced himself to look away as he felt the uncomfortable feeling building between them. 

“So they’ve delayed your flight?” 

“Cancelled,” he huffed. “And with the weather not improving tomorrow not to mention that tomorrow’s Christmas Eve … I’m probably not going to be going anywhere for the next couple of days.”

“I’m sorry,” she said earnestly. “Did you get a rental car at the airport or did they comp you a room?” 

“That’s the best part. The rental car companies are all closed because of hazardous conditions as are the public transit systems and the airport transport only runs every two hours, so they’ll comp a hotel, but I have to wait two more hours to head there. Merry Christmas, huh?” 

She could feel the nervous energy pulsing through her body. This was a man she’d known for years. They had a history. They’d made mistakes. They’d hurt each other on more than one occasion, but they’d also made each other happy. If the shoe was on the other foot, she couldn’t help but think he’d offer her the same courtesy and wasn’t that what this was? It was all it had to be. A courtesy towards a friend. Her teeth bit down on her bottom lip before she spoke. “Well, it’s Christmas,” she began haltingly, “Why don’t you just come back with me?” 

His eyes flashed with surprise as he met her gaze once more. “Um …” The corners of his lips twitched slightly and she felt her cheeks flush. 

“I just mean it’s silly to spend the holidays by yourself if you don’t have to. I’ve got my car and you can come back to the house and it’ll be nice. We can catch up and talk and …” She paused again, the words leaving her. “And it’ll be nice,” she repeated. 

He could sense her hesitation, her nervous energy. In a strange way, it gave him hope – hope that she still felt something – something that wasn’t rage, that wasn’t hatred, that wasn’t complete and total disregard. If she was uncomfortable in his presence, it meant she was conflicted. It meant there was still love and hate jockeying for position inside her heart and if there was a chance – even a small one, he had to seize it. “If you’re sure,” he said finally. “I don’t want to interfere.” 

She nodded. “You won’t be. Not at all. It’s Christmas after all. No one should be alone at Christmas.”


	2. The Years Had Been a Friend

He leaned forward in the seat to peer at the flashing lights ahead. “You think there’s an accident?” he asked. 

“Probably just blocking off the roads,” she answered. She smiled as his eyes narrowed. “I told you, they take this sort of thing very serious. You’d be fresh out of luck if you were hoping to find any bread or milk today.” 

“It’s the middle of the afternoon,” he mused, still a bit stunned. “It’s the night before Christmas Eve and the streets are basically empty. How in the world did they get everyone to stay home?” 

“Everyone was out yesterday before the weather got worse. The local stations started predicting this days ago and then they really kicked into high gear yesterday. Luckily I was already only planning to work a half day yesterday so I was able to finish up everything I needed to do. I did get stuck in the middle of the masses, but that’s the way it goes I guess.” 

She lifted her hand to wave at the officer as she passed. He held up the ‘Drive Carefully’ sign and smiled back at her. She slowed slightly and continued to drive by.   
“Is your apartment in town?” he asked, suddenly realizing he’d gotten in the car without a clue as to where she was actually heading. 

She paused for a moment as she turned the wheel towards the wrought iron gate. “Actually, it’s just up here.” 

He was surprised to see the look of a neighborhood, the beautiful, clearly expensive houses that sat on perfectly manicured lawns. He’d expected they’d keep driving past them, probably moving on to a nice luxury condominium or cluster of townhomes, but instead he felt the car slow and head up the steep the driveway. His eyes widened as he turned in the seat. “This is yours?” 

“You seem surprised,” she said softly. “What were you expecting? Some sort of drab apartment building surrounded by concrete?” 

“No. Of course not,” he answered quickly. The truth was he didn’t know exactly what he’d been expecting. He just knew he hadn’t been expecting this. This wasn’t a house for a single, career-minded woman. This was a house for a family and Phyllis wasn’t … Unless …

He’d been following behind her without even realizing it and it was her voice as she greeted the young woman at the door that shook him from his thoughts. 

“Thank you, Kimberly. That’s perfect. I bet she did. No. You don’t need to. It’ll be fine. I’m sure.” 

His eyes studied the young woman for a moment. It was a face he didn’t know, a name he didn’t recognize. She was younger than either of them, pretty, and clearly a part of this life that Phyllis had created here – the life that so obviously didn’t involve him. 

They were in the midst of a conversation by this point and it would have been rude to interrupt. He slowly slipped off his coat and laid it across the chair by the bar. His eyes fell on the stack of mail neatly placed on the countertop. The breath caught in his throat as his eyes focused on the name printed across the label. Mr. Maxwell Parks. There was a man here. In her house … or was it their home. His stomach dropped and he fought the urge to react. Everything in him wanted to rush this woman, whoever she was, out of the door. He had questions that now seemed to go grow increasingly louder inside his head. He needed answers – answers he knew, in his rational, reasonable mind that he didn’t deserve to request. 

This was her life now. He had no right to intrude. He had no right to even have an opinion, not after the way he’d hurt her, not after what he’d done. It seemed like an eternity as he stood there and waited, but finally he heard what sounded like a farewell. 

Only then did Phyllis finally turn to shed her own coat. He forced a friendly smile as he stared at her hands, waiting for her to shed the leather gloves she donned. The sight of her naked fingers gave him a surge of hope, but still he needed to ask. He had to know. 

“What?” she asked as she felt his eyes heavy on hers. 

The question formed in his mouth. His lips were poised to begin the words when he saw it. It had the perfect place of prominence on her stainless, steel refrigerator. The paper frame had the year 2021 in a fun, festive font at the bottom which proved it was recent. The smile on her face was one he knew well. It was real and genuine. He used to see it on her face when she looked at him. She was happy here – really happy. The little girl she snuggled against had a decidedly different expression on her face. Here eyes focused instead on the slightly dubious, heavy set, red suited man to their right. 

“You have a ….” He fought to control his breath and his expression as he finally relented and gave up on speech. His hand lifted weakly and pointed to the picture behind her. 

She turned around, immediately understanding his reaction. “Oh,” she breathed. “Yeah. Well …” It wasn’t as if she’d expected to hide her. It wasn’t even that she was planning to keep it a secret. It was just that these things weren’t something you shared – not with the man you once lived with, planned a future with, loved, lied to, and then left once the pain and the damage became too much for either of you to take. 

“And you’re married or you’re seeing someone.” He gestured to the letter on the countertop. The flicker in her eyes confirmed his theory. There was so much in her life that he didn’t know, so much he wasn’t a part of. Too much time had passed now. He reached down for his recently discarded coat. “I should probably go,” he whispered. “I’m sure I can find an Uber or something to just take me to the airport. I’m sorry if I caused you any …” 

He froze and thought about the sentenced he’d planned to say. He wasn’t just sorry for the trouble he’d caused her tonight. He was sorry for so much more. “I’m just sorry,” he amended. “It was good to see you.” He forced a smile as he moved towards the door. “Merry Christmas, Phyllis.” 

“Billy – wait.” 

“It’s okay. Honestly. I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. I’ll be fine. This isn’t even close to the worst way I’ve spent a holiday, so …” 

“I want to explain what you saw. It’s not what you think.”

“It’s not?” He narrowed his eyes as he waited for her continue. “I feel like we’ve both said those words to each other a few too many times.” He swallowed hard. “This guy, this Max, he doesn’t live here?” 

She took her own deep breath this time. “Not anymore,” she sighed. “It’s … It’s been a lot. A lot has happened. It’s not as simple as all that. I guess it never really is with me.” 

“Me either,” he shrugged. “And that baby? She’s yours and his?” 

“Not exactly.” She couldn’t help but laugh as she saw the confusion flash in his eyes. “I told you it wasn’t simple.” Her eyes glanced back towards the sofa in the living room. “Why don’t we sit down? I can try to explain. We’ve got some time before she’s up from her nap.” 

He nodded and followed her into the open room. 

Her eyes betrayed her trepidation and he nearly gave into the impulse to reach out and touch her, the need to comfort her was as natural as his own breath. 

“I don’t even know where to start,” she admitted. 

The smile that has melted her so many times somehow gave her comfort even now and she found her body relaxing as she sat down beside him. 

“The beginning works,” he said softly. “I’ve got some time.”


	3. To Innocence

“Maxwell,” she began, “Max. He’s my husband.” The simple sentence seemed to immediately suck the air out of the room. “On paper,” she added, “technically. We’re getting divorced, but it’s okay. We’re good. It’s not ugly or anything. It’s friendly.” 

“That’s good.” He tried to sound sincere, at least more sincere than he felt. At least the words he’d chosen to say in that moment could pass for honesty. He couldn’t pretend to be sorry she wasn’t in a relationship. He couldn’t pretend he was sorry her marriage had ended. He wasn’t. Thinking of her with someone else, no matter who it was, wasn’t something he could ever allow himself to do. “It’s always better to be civil if there are kids involved. It’s better if you can walk away and stay friends.” 

“Friends is all it ever should have been honestly.” It was that realization that had taken her a few too many weeks to realize and far longer to say out loud. “I met Max in Chicago,” she began again. “We were both at an internet marketing seminar. He works with pharmaceutical promotions – those commercials you see for drug companies and stuff.” 

Billy nodded both to show his understanding and to give her encouragement to continue. He needed to understand. 

“He’s a good guy, a great guy really and we hit it off almost instantly. He’s smart, but not arrogant and he doesn’t have that thing that a lot of guys have where they’re intimidated by successful women. We got along well, talked about work and strategy and things like that. He told me he lived in Raleigh and he contracted with some of the big drug companies. By the end of the week, I knew about his wife and the fact that they were expecting their first child.” 

“So he was married?” The flash of hurt in her eyes made him backtrack quickly. “I didn’t mean it like that,” he added. “I’m not judging or anything. God knows I certainly can’t.” 

“I know,” she nodded. “And it wasn’t anything like that anyway.” She leaned back into the cushions before going forward. “Before we left, we exchanged business cards and contact information, but I really thought that was it. I never expected to see or hear from him again.”

“But I guess you did.” 

“Yeah. It was about two weeks later and I was sitting in my office and my cell phone rang. I hadn’t added him in as a contact and it wasn’t a number that I recognized so I almost just let it go to voice mail but, for whatever reason, I didn’t. It was Max. He was telling me about a job that was opening here. One of the major hospitals here was looking for someone with internet marketing experience to help them really amp up their advertising online. They wanted a fresh, new perspective and he thought I might be interested.” 

“In working for the medical field?” Billy leaned back a bit. His skepticism had nothing to do with her abilities, but rather her personality. Phyllis was capable of anything, but he couldn’t envision her spark and energy being satisfied by synthesizing FDA regulations and putting a positive spin on side effects.”

“It was a big change and he knew that.” She shrugged as she remembered her own initial hesitation. “I was a bit taken aback at first. I mean, I don’t have any sort of experience in that field as you know and I was more than a little doubtful that they’d be willing to take a chance on someone like me whose previous work experience was a gossip magazine, a cosmetic company, and a fashion division. But he promised he’d put in a good word for me and he really talked this place up. The salary was almost too good to believe and you can’t beat the benefits package so I kind of felt like I’d be crazy to not at least consider it.” 

He blinked and shook his head. 

“What? You don’t think I should have …” 

“No. It’s none of my business, right? And besides, you’ve clearly done well. I guess I just never realized you weren’t happy working with Jabot. Jack told me you’d decided to move to the partner company based in Chicago, but I just assumed that you were happy and fulfilled and …”

“I wasn’t unhappy exactly. My life was just …” She paused and searched her mind for the right word to explain the feeling. “It just felt empty.” Her eyes met his for a brief moment before the heavy feeling settled over them again. She glanced away. “You know?” 

He didn’t quite trust his own words and chose instead to nod in agreement. God did he ever know. Empty was a word he knew and understood intimately. It was the way his life had felt for years now. His children were the only bright spot in his existence. 

“And truthfully,” She said the words a bit brighter now, desperate to lift the heaviness between them. “It probably helped that he was talking to me in January. We were sitting under 11 inches of snow the day he called and we were expecting another six that night. He’s Facetiming me from his deck where he’s wearing shorts and a t-shirt.” 

“So the Chicago winters were a bit too much for you?” 

“Well, they don’t exactly call it the Windy City for nothing.” She smiled a bit nervously. “Anyway, I agreed to come and at least do the interview and within a week, I was apartment hunting in Durham.” 

“Durham?” 

She nodded. “I told you it was a long story. I started out contracting with Duke and it basically evolved from there. Max was great. He introduced me to all the higher ups. His wife, Marah, was so sweet and you could tell how happy and in love they were. They were so excited about the baby.” 

The tone of her voice and the look in her eyes told him that something was about to change – the happy, sweet story she told was about to take a turn. 

Her eyes darkened as she remembered the events of the day. It was still disturbingly clear in her memory. “I was at the office when he called. His voice was so strange. He didn’t even sound like himself. Marah had gone to the store to pick up a few things and, on her way back, a tractor trailer had crossed over the center line and hit her head on. The doctors did everything they could, but she had severe head trauma. There was pressure and bleeding in and around the brain and they declared her brain dead almost immediately. We all knew that she was gone.” 

“What about the baby?” 

“They weren’t sure at first. It was still too early to deliver, so they had to keep Marah on the machines for a while, just so they baby could keep growing and …” She stopped for a moment and swallowed hard. “It was horrible, knowing she was gone, but not really being able to let her go because she was still there.” 

“And you were there for Max during all of this?” 

“I tried to be. I didn’t know what to do and I sure as hell didn’t know what to say, so I just started staying there so he wouldn’t be alone. I could pretty much work from anywhere with an internet connection, so I would bring my laptop and set up a mobile office in the room. I’d work and we’d talk about anything and everything – everything but what was actually going on in that room. And there was something about it that felt good. I felt like I had a purpose again even if I wasn’t sure my being there was really helping or not.” 

“I’m sure you were helping.” He touched her arm briefly before pulling back, well aware of the fact that touching her was a privilege he’d long since lost. 

She smiled. “And then one day it was time and she was here. He asked me if I wanted to hold her and I did.” The memories came flooding back to her like a wave. She could hear the sounds in the room, the slight beeps of the machines behind her. She could smell the intoxicating baby smell that somehow overtook the sickeningly antiseptic smell of the hospital. “I fell in love with her right then. I wouldn’t have loved her any more if she’d been mine.” 

Her eyes sparkled with tears and emotion and he could see how much she meant each and every word. “She’s lucky to have you,” he whispered. 

“I’m the lucky one. And sometimes it’s hard not to feel guilty. I mean, this horrible, awful thing happens and I walk away with this gift.” She shook her head. “But Max …” She forced air back into her lungs. “It wasn’t the same for him. He loves her. That’s never been an issue. I’ve never doubted that for a second, but when he looks at her, it hurts. He sees Marah there and it breaks his heart and every time that happens he feels more and more guilty. It’s better now than it was, but at first it was really bad, so bad that he had a tough time bonding with her. I knew that they were struggling. I could see it and so I offered to stay with them. Honestly, I’m not even sure how it happened from there. It’s like we were living like a family one day and then the next day we really were.”


End file.
